Flight Pundit

GM Roper of GM’s Corner is
fighting cancer. A group of bloggers silently known as
the South Park Republicans have joined GM in his fight. Over
the next few weeks, the Liberal Church will be
travelling from blog to blog and all donations made
will go to aid GM in his fight against cancer. If you
would like to donate by snail mail, we are working on
a way for you to be able to do that. Cancer can be a
very costly battle and your help is greatly
appreciated. Please add a “Fight On” ribbon to your
blog. Donations can be made during this post. Find the
participants of “Fight On”. South Park
Republicans
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First Church of
Democrats

Bringing liberals closer to
God since 2006
proudly talking liberalism in
the bible belt

Worship songs play -
“Arabs aren’t Europeans” - Choir
“You drop a bomb on me” - Gap Band
“Ship of Fools” - Robert Plant

Welcome to the Liberal church! I am Chuck Schumer, one
of Deimos’ children. Spreading fear
far and wide, as a matter of fact, that’s why I’m here
today!

We have a couple of announcements today, first, our
missionaries in Afghanistan and Iraq have successfully
committed 4,340
acts of protest against Bush’s Islamic Holocaust. 87
more successful protests this week alone! Please keep
the insurgents in your prayers and please donate when
the plate is passed around.

The “Iraqinam Sixties Protest” has smoked a lot of pot
and dropped a lot of acid, so we are flying high over
Arizona! Well not really, Flightpundit probably
wouldn’t approve of hippies doing drugs. It doesn’t
matter though, we’re liberal so we can not really do
any drugs, and say we did, thus it’s true! One of the
great things about being a liberal, facts don’t get in
the way of making our beliefs true!

We also have a new star! Some people think we might be
over-obsessed with sex, but if you are liberal, you
can never be obsessed enough with sex. Our new hero
goes by the name of “Tammy”
and she is all the rage now! Yes, it’s a secret sex
tape! She filmed herself having sex on her cellphone!
Then she had her cellphone stolen and her video is all
over the internet! Sounds like my kind of girl!

I’m going to let you in on a little secret, a former
President and a current Senator are recruiting “Tammy”
for a film. It’s going to be a remake of the 80’s film
‘Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure’, but it takes
place in Chappaquiddick instead of California and the
time machine is a car! It’s going to be a must see for
liberals!

Let us bow our head and make a payment. Oh father
Deimos, give me the strength to scare the living wits
out of Americans today. Let my sermon be so powerful
that every Republican that hears my words switches
parties! O glorious father Deimos, spread your powers
through the room!

From each according to his ability, to each according
to his needs.

While the plate gets passed around, Cindy Sheehan will
be singing a song that she wrote!

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♪♫ ‘Arabs aren’t Americans,’
♫
♫♫ ‘Bush is unAmerican!’
♪
♪♫ ‘If you care about the U.S.’
♫
♫’you’ll be a
socialist!’♫♪
♪♫ ‘UAE is a threat, not Iraq’
♫
♫♫ ‘Bush leads this nation off track’
♪
♪♫ ‘Vote Democrat!’ ♫

Thank you Cindy! Wow, that was original! I am simply
amazed by how you think. That was some amazing and
powerful. Did you think that up all by yourself?
You’re a genious Cindy!

Last week I was able to ignite a
firestorm of fear and criticism of the Bush
administration. This week, I brought not one, but two!
Two lifelong Republicans, to prove just how right I
am!

About a week ago, I brought to our great nation’s
attention about Arabs leasing our ports! Republicans
and Democrats joined hands to demand the Bush
administration rescind the deal.

I decided to investigate even further and found out
more. Not only is Dubai Ports, an Arabic owned company
leasing our ports, but other foriegn companies lease
our ports as well. I asked myself one very serious
question “Why would Arabic people want to come to
America?” We all know the answer to that! To bomb us,
that’s what Arabic people do, they bomb people! So I
wanted to know what they were trying to import. It
turns out they were planning to import things like
hummus, oil, and gasoline.

People, I know that you aren’t science experts, but
gasoline is highly flammable. If you don’t believe me,
I brought a scientist here with me today to confirm
this, and not only is he a scientist, but he’s also a
lifelong Republican scientist. Arabics can use the gas
to make molotov cocktails. They could even fill up a
car with gas and run it into our banks and blow them
up, ruining our economy!

I researched even further. I found out that Arabic
people are already in America! What’s worse, they own
gasoline stations! That’s a lot of molotov cocktails
that they are in control of. No gas station should be
ownd by foriegn people, especially Arabics!

This encouraged me even more! I also found out that
Arabic people own gas stations in Washington DeeCee!
That’s close to the Pentagon where we keep our nuclear
secrets! Bush has dropped the ball on American
security! This is an American trajedy! This can’t go
on like this.

Then today comes this story that there is ‘brown
snow’ falling in Colorado! I’ll bet George Bush
was reading to five year old children when this
happened! Arabs could just fall out of the sky,
disguising theirselves with brown snow! It takes great
Democrats like Cindy Sheehan and Micheal Moore to ride
across America screaming “The Arabs are coming! The
Arabs are coming!” like Paul Revere, before George W.
Bush does anything about Arabs invading our country!

George W. Bush has threatened our security ever since
he’s became President. If he wasn’t President in 2001,
we would have never had the 9-11 attacks. He is not
doing anything for the security of the nation.

Let’s review George W. Bush’s record on American
security. He’s passed the so called Patriot Act! He
had the terminal security racially profiling Arabics!
The audacity to single out people because the color of
their skin or because of their heritage. Then he
starts a war in Afghanistan and Iraq. We shouldn’t be
fighting terrorist in the Middle East, we should be
fighting them here at home!

He was wiretapping average Americans simply because
they had contact with Islamic terrorist organizations.
Now, he’s letting Arabic’s come into our country. This
is just typical Bush. He’s shown absolutely no concern
to American safety. First he discriminates against
Arabics, then he lets Arabics come through the same
ports that we send out nuclear reactors!

Don’t forget how the Department of Homeland security
let hard working Americans die in New Orleans! Then
Republicans accused the people still in New Orleans of
being welfare recipients. They can’t even call them by
their real titles. To you Republicans out there: they
are not welfare Recipients! They are Professional
Daytime Talkshow Analyst! It’s a very difficult job.
They have to keep up with Jerry Springer, Oprah
Winfrey, and Montel Williams without getting them
mixed up. It’s a lot easier than making shady deals on
the golf course.

Bush can not lead this country back to the greatness
that it once was. We need Democrats in power. We will
do something about our ports and not let Arabics in
our ports. We won’t racially profile Arabics in our
airports. We’ll stop Arabics from taking gas stations
away from hard working Americans here at home. Why
should Americans have the hard work of being a
Professional Daytime Talkshow Analyst instead of the
more profitable and easier job of owning a gas
station

Let’s close with a short prayer.

Let us bow our heads and don’t forget your payment.
Holy Deimos. We ask for your divine guidance and lead
this nation into peace. Bless us with Democratic
officials that will only allow American patriots to
lease our ports, own gas stations, and have American
jobs!,

From each according to his abilities, to each
according to his needs.

You may come forward now and seek redemption by
clicking on the button that says Pay Pal.

Last
Weeks Sermon (V)

Please help GM. Join the “Fight On” campaign and
help fight cancer. You can donate by clicking on the
paypal button.

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